Feelings

I feel fat.

No I don't let's get REAL.

What do I really feel? This is often very hard for me to grasp but it's defiantly a big part of my life right now.

Lately I have been using the I feel fat, I feel ugly excuse...and I know that's not right. What am I feeling right now, hahaha. I am feeling way to much. I am feeling physical pain. I am feeling fear, sadness, and grief. Also anger.

It is so hard for me to actually feel the feelings. I have been using the excuse of being fat and ugly. But there is so much more. I wish I could feel. It's something that I long for. But truthfully I think feeling fat is so much easier for me to deal with. I am ready to challenge myself.