Where is my magic wand?

I think I totally jinx myself yesterday.

Really.

After writing that I got triggered by something my Dad said so innocently, his name (my abuser). Ugg. I e-mailed my therapist freaking out and she actually got back to me this morning basically saying I can do this, and that I am stronger than the abuser and that it is just a name. (That part I really don't agree with, his name is so much more. It shouldn't be but it is it's SO FREAKING much more!!) Well I have to wait till Friday to talk to my therapist, I'm sure I'll be okay. But I'm struggling. I had major binge day today since I don't/can't purge anymore it's become physically impossible. Thank you body. Really thank you.

I swear I'm done with this.

I want my magical wand. NOW. So I can say bib itty bobity boob (sorry if that made zero sense but it does in my mind).

I could really use my birthday wish early. I want ED gone, along with PTSD and all the ick that comes along with them.